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What to know when divorcing with kids

Divorce isn’t easy under any circumstances, but children can often be one of the biggest complicating factors. Texas residents with children who are contemplating divorce may have questions about how divorce will affect their kids.

In the end, it’s almost impossible to completely shelter your children from the fallout of a divorce. If you keep in mind certain ways in which you can protect and help your children, thoug, you can make it as painless a process as possible.

Factors to consider

If you’re going through a divorce with children, take a moment to put yourself in your children’s shoes. If your children have a strong attachment to each parent, a divorce can be traumatizing, as your children will likely feel loyalty to both parents. If at all possible, a shared custody situation would allow your children to maintain their relationship with each parent.

Another thing to keep in mind is that trauma can have a multiplicative effect in children. If your child has recently been through a major loss like the death of a close relative or pet, or if they’ve recently had to change schools or move, a divorce right after that may be very difficult for them to cope with.

Ways to soften the impact on your children

Oftentimes, a few therapy sessions with a child or family therapist can make a huge difference in how your children process a divorce. The therapist can give your child some tools for coping with the transition.

Additionally, be mindful of the possibility of trying to preserve your children’s friendships, especially if your child needs to move during a divorce. Losing friends on top of going through a divorce can add to the burden.

Finally, the better you can collaborate and interact with your ex-spouse, the better it generally is for your children. You don’t have to remain friends, but if you can preserve a cordial and functional relationship, that ratchets the tension down significantly.

There’s no magic formula for making divorce easy for children, but if you keep the above in mind, you stand a good chance of lessening the trauma over the long term.